Let it Flow

I’m working my way through Natalie Goldberg’s new book Old Friend from Far Away: The Practice of Writing Memoir and many of the beginning exercises begin with “I remember…”. Below is an excerpt of what I remembered this weekend during one of these writing exercises:

I remember the promise I made to myself when I started my freshman year of college. It went something like “I will not gain the Freshman 15!” I made a pact with my new roommate and some of my new friends. My experience in a gym was limited – high school gym class was it – and while I was active in high school as a member of the marching band colorguard, I wasn’t an athlete. I was so glad to have this new group of friends to accompany me to the gym as I probably wouldn’t have gone alone.

There were 5 of us who walked into the gym that day, male and female, all having made that same promise. I remember thinking “How hard could it be?” I started with the stationary bike, figuring a seated exercise would be easier than anything else. I could handle biking! Boy was I fooled. 6 minutes in and I thought I was going to die. I could barely catch my breath. I looked at my friend, seated on the bike next to me and said “This sucks.” He agreed and we both got off our bikes.

I didn’t return again for 6 months. The return was a result of breaking that promise, because I had in fact gained the freshman 15. Upon my return to the gym, my exercise of choice was the treadmill and I started by walking for 10 minutes. I was there for a while before I slowly increased both duration and intensity, but because I stayed slow and steady, over the years I achieved great fitness success.

If you’re new to exercise or struggling to fit it in, you might be thinking “there’s no way I can do this.” There is no doubt that the road may be long and challenging. But remember baby steps all the way, slowly build and you’ll be amazed at the results. I certainly was. It took time (years), patience and consistent practice to get myself in running shape (remember my start was 10 minutes walking) for various races including 2 successful marathons. Start where you are and build. I didn’t have anyone to teach me that and now find passion in sharing that learning with others.

Stay tuned later this week for sort of a part II: Why Some Minutes are Better than No Minutes

Tags: Fitness and Exercise, Inspiration and Motivation // 2 Comments »

On Thursday my co-host Kathleen Kingsbury and I had the opportunity to interview Lisa Peterson, Founder of Lantern Financial in Boston, MA for our online radio program Breaking the Glass Slipper. Lisa provided many great tips for couples to communicate more effectively about money, highlighting her new service: Harmoney: Pre-Marital Financial Counseling.

When asked to summarize her top three tips for couples to manage finances without a fight she says:

• Forgive and let go – Avoid continuing the fight and certainly don’t use it for ammunition at a later time. Learn and move on
• Fight to solve the problem – If you do end up fighting with your spouse or partner about money, fight to solve the problem, not to win. You’re in it together!
• Get help - Because we’re all brought up with different beliefs about money, often couples have trouble establishing effective communication. Seeking help from an experienced financial planner, advisor or coach can help facilitate productive discussion.

Listen to more tips and the full interview, Fighting Fair Financially, by clicking here.

UPCOMING EVENT

Lantern Financial is sponsoring an event for couples called “Pillow Talk: Make Talking about Money Sexy in your Marriage” on Wednesday, September 24th from 5:30 to 7:00 pm. For more information, call 617-482-2700 or email Lisa at lisa (at) lantern-financial.com.

Tags: Blog Talk Radio, Communication, Stress // Add Comment »

Not getting your workouts in as planned? Skipping meals or heading to the fast food drive through because it’s easier? Stuck in a dead end job thinking you don’t have any other choice? Could be laziness. I recently read a book entitled How Not to Be Afraid of Your Own Life by Susan Piver. (Quick and easy read, by the way. I recommend it.) In it she describes three types of laziness. While she writes about laziness as it pertains to a meditation practice, laziness can apply to almost any of life’s scenarios – achieving weight loss or exercise goals, relationships, or advancing your career. According to Susan and Buddhist philosophy (keep reading, this is very every day stuff) there are several kinds of laziness including:

• Regular Laziness – You’re probably very familiar with this. You get up late on the weekends, you spend time in front of the TV, or you nap knowing there are other perhaps “more fulfilling” things to do. Simply put, you avoid errands, cleaning, work or even spending time with your family.

• Discouragement – When things don’t go according to plan, it’s easy to say, “Why can’t something good happen to me?” Maybe you’re not losing weight as quickly as you might have hoped, perhaps the new job isn’t as challenging as you thought, or maybe you just exited yet another dissatisfying relationship. Bottom line is you think that nothing good will ever come to you and you give up hope.

• Busyness – This is one I had never considered as laziness, but when I really thought about it I realized how much sense it made. We stay busy to avoid things we might be afraid to do (go to the gym) or that we don’t necessarily want to do (go to the gym!). So if you live a life of “too busy” or “things are crazy” or “if I had more time” you are lazy. You avoid what matters most to you, your deepest passions and priorities.

I most often find myself lazy as it pertains to busyness – always thinking the house needs to be cleaned, email to be checked and blogs to be read. All legitimate activities, but are they my priorities? Are they feeding my passions and taking me where I want to go in life? No. And so I’ve become aware of this in order to create a more appropriate action plan and watch for when I allow these things to get in the way of activities that truly make a difference.

What do you think? Are you lazy and not putting what matters most first in your life? How can you stop being “so busy” in order to make time for what matters most?

Tags: Food for thought, Miscellaneous Wellness // 2 Comments »

“The most rewarding things you do in life are often the ones that look like they cannot be done.” - Arnold Palmer, Contemporary Professional Golfer

When asked about the vision and ultimate goal I have for my career, without hesitation I say “I want to be on TV.”  Specifically in a TV host role, the likes of Oprah or Ellen, of course.   I’m often met with looks of shock and bewilderment when I share this big and lofty goal with others.  I do, thankfully, have a small circle of people who are very supportive and encouraging. Will this media dream come true?  Only time and my actions will tell.  Because the answer is unknown, giving up would be so easy.  I won’t, though, until I’ve exhausted every avenue that could take me closer.  I know when it will be time to give up and move on to something else, and right now is not that time.  In fact, I’m only just beginning.

The quote above is a great reminder for me to keep my dream going, to make it real. Just the other day I added: publish a poem (a very new genre of writing for me), publish a children’s book focusing on healthy living and write a song (a childhood dream of mine). At this time I don’t really care about the odds, because as far as I know they are in my favor.  I will continue to make strides through my current activities that include an online radio show, online video segments, my writing and networking.  I’m just a girl who likes to dream big. I always have. Except this time, I’m ready for it. The dream feels right and makes sense.  In my gut I know I’ve got to go for this one, despite what anyone else might say.  I feel good just writing about it.

What dreams do you have that you’re hiding or too afraid to go for?  What have you got to lose?  The way I see it, even if I don’t end up on TV, at least I will be able to say I tried instead of always wondering “What if”.

Tags: Food for thought, Inspiration and Motivation, Inspirational quotes // 4 Comments »

With all the talk these days about finding more time in your day, Tony Schwartz, Founder and President of the Energy Project says manage your energy to get more done in less time for a better quality of life. This 30 second video clip explains more. What do you think? Could this be the answer?

Manage Energy to Manage Your Time

Tags: Food for thought, Stress // 2 Comments »

After reading a blog post by Mark Salinas entitled “How About a Walk?” I found myself appreciating his post and wondering when fitness became so complicated. With so many diet and exercise books and programs available, how is it that so many people are still trying to find the magic pill, potion or program? Where are we going wrong? Has fitness become too complicated?

I worked with a personal trainer several years ago who had me doing all sorts of complicated exercises. I wasn’t a beginner and she thought I could “handle it”. I couldn’t and I had to ask her to simplify. My work and personal life provided enough complications, my workout, I told her, needed to be simple. As a fitness professional by training, I know that simple can also be effective and sometimes that’s the best recipe for success. Are you familiar the KISS Principle? (no, not the rock group) Life is complicated enough, I say keep your exercise and weight management activities easy.

And that’s why I loved Mark’s post about walking. It served as a great reminder to me that walking is a basic activity that the average healthy person is very capable of performing. It’s simple, affordable and accessible. No exotic locations or fancy equipment are needed to take a walk. Can’t get outside or live in an unsafe area? Check out walking fitness videos like Leslie Sansone’s Walk at Home program. While I haven’t tried this program myself, I know several people who love it.

I went for a morning walk on the beach yesterday and it was absolutely amazing. It was early, the air was still cool and the crowds had not yet arrived. This walk fed more than my need for physical activity, it helped cleared my mind and lift my spirit. What better way I though than to start my day than a walk on the beach? No cars, no noise, just the waves crashing. The walk provided me with an invigorating whole body experience. Walking is a simple, yet wonderful family friendly and relationship building activity. Meeting friends out? Why not walk instead?

Need more reasons to walk? I Googled “benefits of walking” and found tons of links on why walking is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Usually I enjoy a run, but yesterday’s walk on the beach changed me and now I, too, will start asking “how about a walk.”

Tags: Fitness and Exercise, Hiking and Outdoor Activities // 4 Comments »

I’m excited to announce my new Blog Talk Radio Show called Breaking the Glass Slipper, co-hosted with my friend and colleague Kathleen Burns Kingsbury of KBK Connections. Kathleen is a Money Coach specializing in helping women “talk to their money”. The show focuses on helping women talk to and about money in order to attain career success and financial freedom. The show airs live on Thursdays, 8am EST for 30 minutes. Archives are available if 8am is too early! We welcome show call-ins and questions.

Today Kathleen interviewed Leanna Hamill on Cost Effective Marketing for Small Business Owners. We are working on our fall line up and will post information as it is available. You can also listen to the most recent show via the Blog Talk Radio Player in the sidebar on the right.

If you have questions you’d like answered leave a comment or send me an email and we’ll do our best to address is on the show.

Want to be a guest? Send me an email telling us why.

Tags: Blog Talk Radio // 4 Comments »

Last week I had an unexpected urge to put together a puzzle (First picture is what it will look like, 2nd picture is current status). Admittedly this is an urge I’ve never had before. I found an unopened puzzle in the closet, leftover from a Christmas grab. My first thought when I looked at all of the pieces was “Wow, this is going to be hard!” and isn’t that just like me to start out any project thinking that. That will change.

I stood there and stared at the pieces, not knowing where to start. I had dumped all 500 “curly” puzzle pieces onto the table and began to sift through them. I decided that looking at 500 pieces on the table was not going to make me successful. I put the pieces back in the box and looked at the big picture again. What would be an easy area to start with? The flower garden? Picture window? Certainly not the ocean and sky - too mono-color. I chose the picture window and the flower garden. After 4 days the puzzle, I’m happy to say, is coming together nicely. And not surprisingly I’ve learned a few things that will help me not only put the puzzle together, but will help me in other areas of my life as well. Putting a puzzle together has offered me great insight to my learning and action style.

Here are some parallels:

Too many pieces is overwhelming. Just as too much information is overwhelming. I had to put the pieces back in the box and start with just a few. When I’m on information overload I have trouble taking action.  I work well with small bits of information (or puzzle pieces!)

Work in baby steps. This is familiar to me and I know working in small, manageable sections allowed me to see more clearly how the pieces of the puzzle fit together. Before I knew it my little sections were connecting to create a larger section. And that is very satisfying. Sometimes the baby steps in life don’t appear to be much, but they are.

Always keep the final puzzle picture close. I find myself looking at the puzzle picture quite often, which reminds me about the importance of having a goal in mind. I have personal and professional goals written down, and admittedly I don’t review them often. This puzzle has served as a great reminder to pull them out, keep them close and look at them often. This bigger picture is what the baby steps are creating.

Do a little bit each day. Sometimes I get caught in the trap: I have to finish everything NOW which may mean hours of work at a time. I’ve got to manage my time. I find that setting aside short bits of time creates a framework I can be happy with and manage appropriately. I avoid the frustration that might follow wondering “Why isn’t it done yet?”

Celebrate and Share Success. At the end of each puzzle session I’m often amazed at what I accomplish. I find myself smiling and wanting to share my work with my husband. I need to start celebrating all of my accomplishments in this way - personally and professionally. I do have a lot to celebrate and it makes the process that much more enjoyable.

Tags: Food for thought, Miscellaneous Wellness, Positive Thinking // 2 Comments »

I went to the beach Friday with my husband, sister, my niece (4) and nephew (6). Friday was a full moon, the tide was on it’s way in and the waves, for this particular beach, were larger than normal.

Boogie Boards in hand, the 5 of us headed for the water. My husband was the first one in, followed by my nephew and my sister. I stayed back with my niece – the water was too cold for me! In fact, I used the word freezing as the water settled around my ankles giving me an ankle rush similar to the head rush I occasionally get when eating ice cream.

In the past, fear of being cold had always stopped me from enjoying a dip in the ocean. As I watched the others play and giggle in the water, I decided to turn this situation into an opportunity for personal development.

I asked myself “What are you afraid of the cold water for? What’s the worst that could happen?”

The worst that could happen is I would be cold. Suddenly that wasn’t a good reason.

Then I thought, “What would happen if you submerged your entire body into the water rather than just your ankles? Would you still be as cold?”

The answer in my mind became “No.” Then I thought about my career. “What are you dipping only your toes into, thinking too much about, and not doing?” Use the ocean as a baby step to move you forward.

I waited for my sister to come out to watch my niece. I grabbed my boogie board and without thinking, joined my husband and nephew on the waves.

I was right. By submerging my whole body, I no longer had that “cold rush” around my ankles and I was having so much fun. I was relaxed and fearless. I was laughing, giggling and hooting on every wave. I was 35 going on 6. And it felt incredible. I was energized and no longer cold. In fact, I didn’t even think about the cold. The rewards were so much greater than my original concerns. And my original concerns now seemed ridiculous.

I experience fear as I try to build a career on my own – as a speaker, writer – there is no one to hide behind making it easy get caught up in fears, wondering “What if” and thinking about failure. It’s easy to stay on the outside and just dip my toes. What are your fears? What are you resisting in your own life – whether personal or professional? Where are you just dipping your toes and what are you missing out on? We think it’s safer there. It’s not. By simply dipping our toes we miss out on so much opportunity. On Friday I realized that dipping just my toes can be more painful than jumping right in. When I “dip my toes” I think too much and block myself from experiencing true reward. Thanks to my Friday morning boogie board experience, I’m done missing out. I made a promise to start (with appropriate calculations on risk) jumping right in and experiencing all the rewards available to me. Will you join me?

What are you dipping your toes in and thinking too much about? What if you took a baby step the way I did? Have you? Share your experiences!

Tags: Uncategorized // 2 Comments »

Find someone who knows Photoshop. I’ve said this before, but I found this video, created by diet.com, so now hopefully you can see how things really happen.

The photographer in this video is pretty candid about what goes on in the fashion/model world. However, Sarah, the host, is already very fit, so photoshopping her almost seems ridiculous (which I suppose is part of the point). That said, check out this YouTube video to see some changes he made, even to an already fit individual.

And remember, go easy on yourself. We’re all human trying to do the best we can. Exercise regularly, eat to nourish (and of course enjoy without over-indulging!) and know that you are beautiful as you are. And if you’re still not happy? Well, we’ll cover that in another post.

Tags: Uncategorized // 4 Comments »